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The Power of the 2nd Question

February 27, 2024

“The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.” 

Proverbs 20:5
This verse paints an incredible picture of discipleship for us. A man’s “purpose” is the decision-making control center that lives in the 300’ well of a person’s heart. The discipleship Proverbs 20:5 refers to is doing the Spirit-empowered work of “drawing out” people’s decision-maker hidden in the bottom of their heart-well to be influenced by the Gospel. 

“Drawing out” is an art and with the right tools our follow-up questions can provide clarity in confusion, expose mediocre motivations, and set the stage for personal assessment. 

The fastest way to deepen your group’s level of discipleship is by mastering the power of follow-up questions. Let’s look together at a few examples you can use this week:

Dig Deeper: These encourage the person to go further into a topic they’ve brought up. You’ll most often use these questions to understand a previous statement and get clarity from them. Examples include “Tell me more about that…”, “Can you explain that for me?”.

Personal Assessment: People are often quick to discuss the events of their lives but will rarely discuss their emotions or thoughts. Personal Assessment questions allow you to lead someone in answering questions about their heart and not just about their behavior. Examples include, “What was your role in that situation?”, “When you did that, what were you thinking/ feeling?”

Motivation Revealer: People do what they do because they want what they want - and if a person is motivated by anything more than Jesus they need to have that graciously and lovingly revealed to them. When done at the right time and with the right tone, these are the questions you’ll see God use to transform people’s lives. Examples are, “In that moment, what did you want most?”, “What do you think would solve this problem?” 

A great place to begin is your own heart. Consider the motivations behind your actions. Answer honestly and consider if your motivations were pleasing and honoring to the Lord in the decisions you made and, if not, confess them and ask for His forgiveness. 

Start first by drawing out your purposes. And as men and women of understanding, may the Spirit empower us to draw out the purposes of those whom we shepherd.

We are praying for God to continue to work in you and through you as you use these follow-up questions to draw out your people’s hearts.